kittenmaximus:

Zevran “anyone up for a little naked cliff diving” Arainai, unknowingly trying to seduce a lesbian target and getting his drink poured over his head.

Zevran “falling down a flight of stairs is an adventure” Arainai, being sent to kill a Circle mage and instead tripping his way down the entire tower.

Zevran “you’re no master assassin” Arainai, trying to unsheathe his daggers and hitting himself in the face, twice.

Zevran “i’ll flirt while lying in a pool of my own blood with the person who put me there” Arainai, trying and failing to pick a lock, then getting hit in the face when someone opens the door.

Zevran “i have faith that my friends will one day stab me in the back” Arainai, trying to poison a target and instead accidentally poisoning someone else instead, who then somehow pushes his actual target down a flight of break neck stairs, so mission sort of accomplished.

Zevran “what a remarkable amount of lava. do you think anyone ever falls in?” Arainai, trying to shoot his target with a crossbow and giving himself a black eye with the kick back.

Really Average Assassin Zevran Arainai